Joey Chestnut: He’s the guru of gluttony

One president, William Howard Taft, was a mountain of a man when he took office, weighing in at more than 335 pounds. He was 5-11 in height.

According to reliable reports, Taft began his day with a 12-ounce steak for breakfast and went on from there. He tried to diet but was said to have left the White House at roughly the same weight as when he arrived. His gargantuan appetite was simply too much.

However, later in life as he followed doctor’s orders, he did manage to trim down. He died when his heart gave out at the age of 72.

So San Jose’s Joey Chestnut, regarded as the world’s champion competitive eater by most experts in this esoteric field of endeavor, is in fine company. He is heir to our rich tradition of wretched excess at table.

This guru of gluttony recently won another holiday eating contest by wolfing down 76 hotdogs in 10 minutes. It was a record, one of several dozen owned by Chestnut.

He has captured crowns for inhaling all manner of cuisine within specified (short) time limits. These include: an entire 9.35-pound turkey; 121 Twinkies (heaven, help him); 118 jalapeño poppers; 54 brain tacos; 15 pounds of shrimp cocktail; and 55 glazed doughnuts.

The guy’s colon must be cast-iron. He has become what amounts to an over-eating institution, an icon of gut-stuffing if you will. He has become the anti-Jenny Craig.

Some of his feats are televised. The media dotes on him. His website promotes his own brand of mustard and sauces (but, surprisingly, no particular antacid). He touts his own bobblehead doll.

How does he do it? How does he manage to shove such massive amounts of vittles down his gullet without keeling over in a painful, stomach-clutching stupor?

He trains. He has a strict pre-competition regimen that enables his limber insides and expansive esophagus to handle what’s coming. And he’s no William Howard Taft. He’s not grossly fat at all.

In the end, Chestnut is expanding on an American legacy that dates back centuries. Naturally, we can’t help but watch.

Oh, and by the way, one question: Is Chestnut allowed to dine at an all-you-can-eat buffet? You have to wonder. With his well-documented ability, he would pose a threat to the bottom line. Bring out the Tums.

HISTORY MAY REPEAT IN SAN MATEO: What goes around comes around. That appears to be the case in the North Central neighborhood of San Mateo.

For decades, the area (bounded roughly by Highway 101, the Caltrain rail line, Third and Peninsula avenues) has been without a local elementary school.

College Park Elementary School, though located within North Central, is a specialized magnet school with an emphasis on the Mandarin Chinese language.

Officials of the San Mateo-Foster City Elementary School District, responding to pressure from the community, are aiming to rectify the situation. They are looking to locate a school within North Central. Again.

There is a bit of irony there. Into the 1960’s, North Central actually had two elementary schools within its boundaries: Lawrence and Turnbull (originally Poplar Avenue School).

A third campus, Peninsular Avenue School, was also in the mix, though just outside what has been traditionally targeted as North Central.

That school was located at the corner of Peninsula Avenue and El Camino Real on the Burlingame border.

All three schools were shut down many years ago for a variety of different reasons.

The Lawrence site today is occupied by housing. Turnbull’s land houses regional offices of the California Water Service Co. The Peninsular campus is now a senior citizens living complex.

You can get in touch with John Horgan, whose late father taught at College Park when it was a neighborhood school in the early 1950’s, by email at johnhorganmedia@gmail.com.