What they actually want for Father’s Day

The gift no one is buying

Nearly one-third of American dads said they don’t want a gift at all, according to a 2024 YouGov survey. Fifty-eight percent say what they really want is time with their kids. After that, dads pick a meal at home, then a meal out, then control of the remote for the afternoon.

The frustration with all the wrapping and shopping isn’t new either. Nearly half of consumers in 2023 claimed Father’s Day has gotten too commercial, which is probably why so many dads shrug when you ask them what they want.

“I just want a lockbox to put all the family’s phones in for a day,” said Russell Kirkland, dad of two young adults.

But the gift industry doesn’t really care what dads say. Greeting cards still top the list of what people buy, at 58%, followed by clothing at 55% and special outings at 53%. None of that is bad, exactly. It’s just not always what was asked for.

The food question

If you want to do Father’s Day right, start with the food. A YouGov 2025 poll found that 44% of dads want a homemade meal more than anything else, compared with 36% who’d rather go to a restaurant. Cooking at home wins, and it usually isn’t even close. The why of that isn’t complicated: a meal at home means the kids are there, everybody sits down and there’s no rush to pay the check or get the table back. Dad gets to linger in his own kitchen with the people he likes most.

Mark Henry, father of two young adults, says, “My kids are coming home for a cookout. That’s literally all I want.” When asked whether he’d be doing the cooking, he said he definitely would.

What’s actually on the table varies, but there are favorites. Steak, ribs and burgers turn up everywhere, and anything cooked over fire is a safe bet. Breakfast is underrated, and a plate of biscuits and sausage with a strong cup of coffee will beat a wrapped present for many dads. Dessert is almost always whatever his mama used to make, no matter what time of year it is.

One more thing about Father’s Day food: most dads don’t want to be the one cooking it. The classic image of dad at the grill while the family hangs around with drinks is, for a lot of dads, work. He’d rather sit down. If grilling is what’s happening, the kindest thing is to take the tongs from him.

Time with family reigns supreme

There’s a reason time tops the list in every survey; 85% of fathers say being a parent is the most important part of who they are. Around 8 in 10 say it’s a job they enjoy, and historically, dads have been about twice as likely as moms to say they don’t get enough time with their kids. So when a dad says he doesn’t want anything for Father’s Day, it usually doesn’t mean he wants nothing at all. It means the thing he wants isn’t on a shelf at Target.

There’s also something quieter going on. More than half of dads say they feel judged for how they parent, most often by their own spouse. Father’s Day is one of the few days when nobody’s keeping score, and that alone is worth something to a lot of fathers.

The dads who want to disappear for a few hours

The same YouGov survey found some dads want the opposite of a big gathering, with 19% saying they want time alone, while 15% said they want to do nothing at all. A quiet morning, a round of golf with no one tagging along, an hour with a book on the porch, all of it counts.

It can seem strange for a man to want both a family dinner and a couple of hours to himself in the same day, but most dads don’t see those as opposites. He just wants the day to feel like his. Sometimes that’s loud and full of people, and sometimes that’s the house to himself. What dads really want is a stretch of hours that belong to them. For some, that’s the whole family at the table. For others, that’s nobody at all, and a sandwich he doesn’t have to share.

And age seems to matter. Similar to mothers on Mother’s Day, the trend seems to be that the dads of toddlers and younger kids wish for a day to themselves, while the dads of adults just want the kids to come home for the day.

How to pull this off

The easiest plan is the most obvious one: cook the meal he loves or take him to the restaurant he keeps going back to. Don’t overthink the wrapping and show up with the people he wants around him.

If you do want to give him a tangible gift, give him something he wouldn’t buy himself, such as a good bottle of bourbon, a steak from a real butcher, beans from a coffee roaster he’s mentioned or a subscription to something he reads or eats his way through. Anything that gets used up is better than anything that has to be displayed.

Skip the predictable stuff, like branded grilling gear, novelty mugs and “World’s Best Dad.” Basically, anything that goes right into the same drawer as the ties. And if you really don’t know, just ask him. Whatever he says first is probably the truth. Most dads aren’t being modest when they say they don’t need much. They mean it.

Lucy Brewer is a professional writer and fourth-generation Southern cook who founded Southern Food and Fun. She’s passionate about preserving classic Southern recipes while creating easy, crowd-pleasing dishes for the modern home cook.