Nationally, regionally and locally, there has been a lot of acrimony this election season. Neighbors, friends and family members who often agree on many things found themselves bitterly divided over candidates and issues. We have all emerged a bit battered and with, perhaps, a few scars. While we do not have the answers to healing the national rifts that have emerged, we know that we can lead by example here in San Mateo County by continuing to do things the “San Mateo County” way — collaborating together respectfully with other leaders and our communities to reach consensus and make meaningful progress while respecting all stakeholders, even those we do not agree with. In the words of the late John Lee, mayor of San Mateo, “We can disagree on items without being disagreeable.”
In a democracy, disagreements are inevitable. We will never agree with someone else 100% of the time or should we expect that to be the case. These inevitable disagreements can result in anger, bitterness and pettiness or they can be a force of and for good. It is how we handle them that makes all the difference. Hearing other perspectives can result in evolving mindsets and better outcomes. Listening carefully, with an open mind and heart, to someone who disagrees with you and truly trying to understand where they are coming from requires and reveals our humanity. Equally importantly, listening carefully — even when we disagree — also ensures that people feel heard and validated.
Healing and moving forward will require more than just listening carefully, however. We will also need to disagree respectfully when disagreements arise. In San Mateo County, our leaders have usually tried to listen to one another and the community and then work shoulder to shoulder and hand in hand to tackle the big issues. We must continue to do so respectfully and collaboratively with the goals of building consensus and improving quality of life for everyone foremost in our minds. We believe our local leaders can continue to lead by example here at home and show the region, the state and the nation that even when divisive issues arise, we can still be civil to and compassionate with one another.
If you are looking for a way to move past the acrimony of election season and remind yourself of the good in the world, consider giving back to your community by volunteering. Samaritan House, Caminar, Second Harvest, The Boys and Girls Club and many other incredible local nonprofits always need help. Whether you have or had children or relatives in public schools, spending some time helping your local education foundation or PTA would be a wonderful way to give back to your community. It might be some time before our youth recreation sports leagues return to normal but when they do, remember that these organizations cannot exist without volunteer time and energy. Coaching, refereeing or serving on the board of one of these organizations are also great ways to give back. Nothing feeds the soul like helping others.
2020 has been an abnormally long and trying year. Campaign season has only added to the angst and stress in everyone’s lives. But, thankfully, campaign season is finally over. Let us put the 2020 election behind us and turn our attention toward working together for a better tomorrow with tolerance in our hearts and understanding in our minds.
Carole Groom is a member of the San Mateo County Board of Supervisors and former San Mateo mayor. Charles Stone is the vice mayor and former mayor of Belmont. Views their own.
Charles Stone, as a member of the Belmont City Council, you are one of the worst for not listening or responding to those who disagree with you or other city officials. Your words in this article are empty and hypocritical.
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Charles Stone, as a member of the Belmont City Council, you are one of the worst for not listening or responding to those who disagree with you or other city officials. Your words in this article are empty and hypocritical.
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Keep the discussion civilized. Absolutely NO personal attacks or insults directed toward writers, nor others who make comments.
Keep it clean. Please avoid obscene, vulgar, lewd, racist or sexually-oriented language.
Don't threaten. Threats of harming another person will not be tolerated.
Be truthful. Don't knowingly lie about anyone or anything.
Be proactive. Use the 'Report' link on each comment to let us know of abusive posts.
PLEASE TURN OFF YOUR CAPS LOCK.
Anyone violating these rules will be issued a warning. After the warning, comment privileges can be revoked.