Tips for staying calm during the election results

“To say people are stressed out is an understatement,” said Dr. Helen Marlo, a licensed clinical psychologist and dean of the School of Psychology at Notre Dame de Namur University in Belmont. 

With high-anxiety inducing situations, Marlo said not to confuse control with influence. Often when people feel like they can’t control something, they feel dissuaded to participate or to try to influence it in the first place.

In the case of elections, voting may feel obsolete — particularly in California where races feel like they can be predicted — but Marlo said there is “still a lot that people need to do or can do to effect change.” 

“When we lose or can’t control something, we can go down a path that our actions don’t have any impact, and that’s something to watch,” Marlo said. “There’s so many of us where the idea of it not going the way we want can be unthinkable, and that’s part of the hardship. The idea of pivoting right now might be unthinkable, but being able to do that will be important.” 

Results for many items on the ballot may be uncertain for multiple days, so navigating the intense emotions and feelings felt throughout the rest of the week will be important, Marlo said. 

“When you can’t control something and you feel passionate about something, there are going to be strong feelings,” Marlo said. “If people don’t regulate their feelings, they don’t even know them, it can lead to patterns and actions of behavior that aren’t productive, including giving up or acting out.” 

Tactical things to work through the flurry of emotions can include uninhibited expressive writing, and what Marlo described as “4x4x4 breathing,” where you breathe in for a count of four, breathe out to a count of four, and do that for four minutes straight, and ideally four times a day. 

The four minutes of intentional breathing allows for the sympathetic nervous system to get out of a stressed state, Marlo said. While this practice is good in the moment, the consistent habit also helps build your stress tolerance. 

“If you have something you’re stressed about, duck into the bathroom and do that breathing,” Marlo said. “It will help you be less reactive, less impulsive, less likely to lash out or become overly emotional.” 

“Doomscrolling” or overconsuming media is often a sign that individuals may be avoiding the overwhelming feelings that may arise, Marlo said, which can cause them to “foreclose from imagining possibilities.” 

Remaining curious is a viable way to avoid feeling paralyzed by the feelings of uncertainty, Marlo said, and separating what might be “worst-case scenarios” from reality is necessary. 

“If you keep learning, you can reimagine possibilities, you can reimagine action, reimagine agency,” Marlo said. “Curiosity and fear often have a hard time coexisting together.”

Regardless of the outcomes of the packed ballot, Marlo said it’s important to remember things are never black or white, and recommends “getting out of polarities and think divergently.” 

“There’s such a polarization and I think that whether you’re on the right or left, you can react from a really charged polarized way,” Marlo said. “Try to see it in not so absolute terms. There’s gray and there’s nuances.”