Things that matter

We often wonder if it isn’t more conducive to mental health to just not care any more — to just try to protect our little corner of the world as best we can and live for whatever distraction and enjoyment today can bring and forget the rest. We see so many people around us doing this that we wonder that if we, who have tried to be involved and caring up to now, should join what seems to be the uninvolved majority. Such a situation can make us lose hope that things will improve, yet one of the most devastating things that can occur to this country would be for us to give up the idea that we can make a difference.

Trying to deal with injustice, irresponsibility, dishonesty and even evil seems so futile. Yet the belief we are capable and confident enough to make some change is critical to our health and happiness. It is also basic to self-respect, self-confidence and self-esteem and optimism which is inextricably meshed with hope.

Robert B. Reich wrote in his thought-provoking book, “The Common Good”: “The era we are living in offers many illustrations of greed, narcissism and hatefulness. I, however, firmly believe it is not hopeless. Almost every day I witness or hear of the compassion and generosity of ordinary Americans. Their actions rarely make headlines, but they constitute much of our daily life together. The challenge is to turn all this into a new spiritedness extending to the highest reaches in the land — a public morality that strengthens our democracy, makes our economy work for everyone, and revives trust in the major institutions of America.”

Maybe it’s not as simple as that. That’s asking a lot of people who are already overwhelmed with responsibilities, but there is much we can do to generate hope. We can become involved in the positive aspects of the holiday season — a celebration of hope in whatever way our beliefs encourage. Though some days may seem dark and dreary and events are often dismaying, we can light a candle, offer a cheerful greeting, come together in good will and rekindle the warmth of love and the feeling that there may be hope for humankind after all.

Doing something during the holiday season to sustain or renew hope in our lives and that of others will benefit all of us. We can focus on what we have, not on what we lack and in the process donate generously to the less fortunate.

We can work on simplifying our schedules so we have time to relax and absorb some of the spirit of the season. We can make a point of spending time with people who lift our spirits (including our children) and help us feel good about ourselves. And if our storehouse of hope still needs restocking, maybe we need to turn off the TV news and skip reading grim reports in newspapers and enjoy the puzzles, the opinion page and even the sports reports and other less depressing items until we feel more positive and optimistic and regenerated.

“The moral fiber of our society has been weakened but it has not been destroyed. We can recover the rule of law and preserve our democratic institutions by taking a more active role in politics. We can protect the truth by using facts and logic to combat lies. We can fight against all forms of bigotry. We can strengthen the bonds that connect us to one another by reaching out, and help resurrect civility by acting more civilly toward those with whom we disagree.” — Reich.

And don’t forget what Martin Luther King Jr. once reminded us: “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.”

Do have happy holidays!

Since 1984, Dorothy Dimitre has written more than 1,000 columns for various local newspapers. Her email address is gramsd@aceweb.com.