The art of an introduction

Introductions in bulk are certainly tricky to negotiate, but even single introductions can pose a challenge. Knowing how to behave when meeting new people is an art that many are constantly in the process of developing. Some don’t pay much attention to how they act in first meetings; some people actively refine their self-presentation. But we all introduce ourselves so darn frequently (think about it — in any given week you meet at least a few people, if not a slew at a party or other social gathering) that everyone is to some extent aware and trying to do a good job.

The importance and style of an introduction varies between settings. Each country has a particular set of beliefs about how one should behave when meeting others. In America, for instance, we have a cultural conviction with regards to the handshake — "Now son, a real man grips real hard, like this” (cue bone-crushing squeeze).

 Introductions have particular importance in business and politics, where first impressions are heavily emphasized. Beyond these two areas of the adult world, though, I think teens view the process by which adults meet other people is in general more structured than their own.

Teen introductions, for the most part, take place under pretty relaxed circumstances. Whether we actually feel relaxed when meeting new people depends, but the absence of social rules or specific structure is common. This is true because most meetings are through mutual friends — at a party, or between classes. The hubbub of surrounding people helps as well to diffuse the on-the-spot feeling that first encounters sometimes give. Some scrutiny still takes place, of course, teens make the goal to engage only casually with the other person, a less direct or confrontational approach.

This often doesn’t mesh well with adults’ expectations for behavior when meeting teenagers. Some teens adapt to this difference by presenting themselves more formally than they would to their peers. Others don’t, and, well, you know how that goes ("Now, you would just think that young man was raised in a barn!”).

As I get older, the way in which I present myself in social settings will continue to evolve. Each person has a unique approach, of course, but I think it’s fair to say that different protocols exist for each age group.

Being able to conduct oneself well in different age groups is important, but this ability doesn’t result necessarily from a concerted effort. I find that if I think too hard about each moment in a first interaction, I quickly get caught up in details that inhibit my ability to actually pay attention to the people around me and enjoy myself. In my opinion, the goal is an understanding of the tone of the group you’re with. It might be formal, informal or somewhere in between, but it’s there, revealed by both obvious and subtle clues. I think that taking a few moments to adjust for this nuance, especially for high schoolers, is the crucial part. After that, genuine interest in the people you’re meeting does the rest.

Ari Brenner is a senior at Aragon High School. Student News can be reached at studentnews@smdailyjournal.com.