Rain. Potential for heavy rainfall. Low 54F. Winds SSW at 10 to 15 mph. Chance of rain 100%. Rainfall near a half an inch..
Rain. Potential for heavy rainfall. Low 54F. Winds SSW at 10 to 15 mph. Chance of rain 100%. Rainfall near a half an inch.
Updated: April 20, 2026 @ 4:06 pm
As my husband and I had dinner with two people who had asked us to officiate their wedding, we asked them to share why they had decided to get married. One said that it was an audacious claim to say that —despite what the world can do to us — he was going to wake up next to the person he loved every day for the rest of his life.
Of course we wove that into the ceremony we wrote for them and we were so honored to participate in that audacity of hope.
Former President Obama’s book by that title represented his belief that, despite division, people could come together and get big things done. I think of marriage equality as one of the fruits of his labor. Getting our economy back on track after the Great Recession, passing the Affordable Care Act, ending Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, rescuing the auto industry, and implementing DACA (Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals) are among other audacious accomplishments.
I’m reminded of 2008 when, as an Obama volunteer, I arrived home after helping to flip a “red” county in Nevada blue, part of what brought Obama victory, and having our celebration dampened by finding out that Proposition 8, prohibiting gay marriage, had passed in that same election. My husband and I had hastily legally married in the short window between the time the California Supreme Court had ruled that banning same-gender marriage was unconstitutional and California voters trumping that decision. Heartbreaking, but not for too long.
For around 15 years my husband and I have been blessed to be invited to speak to students in a sexual ethics class at a Jesuit university. Every semester we get to share our story with a few dozen students and take their questions. Back when we started, we fielded lots of questions about why two men or two women should be allowed to marry. In recent years, the questions have become more focused on why any pair of people would decide to marry, how two people can maintain a healthy relationship given the stresses of the world, how spirituality/religion play a role in our lives, and how individuals can be more supportive of LGBTQQIA+ people. It has been an amazing evolution of thought by young people on accepting others but there’s also a big problem. According to studies, American youth, especially college age, are suffering from extreme loneliness, which can in part be attributed to the isolation during COVID, but was also a trend that was growing long before the pandemic struck. Developing true, deep, close relationships seems to have become much harder and the results for mental and physical health are stark.
Earlier this month, the surgeon general of the United States, Dr. Vivek Murthy, reported on what scientists are noting as an epidemic. While raising the alarm about the impact of this situation, he also laid out a “National Strategy To Advance Social Connection.” Bravo, given that one half of Americans are reporting severe isolation and loneliness.
Murthy said: “Given the profound consequences of loneliness and isolation, we have an opportunity, and an obligation, to make the same investments in addressing social connection that we have made in addressing tobacco use, obesity and the addiction crisis, we are called to build a movement to mend the social fabric of our nation. It will take all of us — individuals and families, schools and workplaces, health care and public health systems, technology companies, governments, faith organizations, and communities — working together to destigmatize loneliness and change our cultural and policy response to it.”
The young couple whose wedding we officiated are blessed to have a deep and strong network of friends and family and one of the key reasons they wanted to have a wedding ceremony was to let all of those people know how precious they are and how much they are counting on that social fabric to help carry them through life. What a privilege to be asked to solemnize that bond!
As I look at our nation today, especially given the horrible violence we see in the news just about every day, I believe that loneliness and isolation, and the influence of social media and one-sided news bubbles, are major contributors to our morass. The surgeon general has laid out a plan for each of us individually, businesses, organizations, and communities of faith, to participate in to move us from isolation to community. I have the audacity of hope that if I, an introvert, can accept more invitations to create deeper connections with more people, we can all do so and heal some of the hurt too many of us are suffering. Check out the surgeon general’s plan and see somewhere that you can join in.
Craig Wiesner is the co-owner of Reach And Teach, a book, toy and cultural gift shop on San Carlos Avenue in San Carlos.
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(14) comments
Craig: As soon as I saw the title of your column this morning, President Obama’s book came to my mind. Sure enough, that’s the one you were writing about, and were inspired by. I have read all his books, and especially that one inspired me, too, as did your piece. What business of anyone else is it who someone else marries, or lives with? As if we don’t have enough real problems in this world! As has become so embarrassingly apparent about a certain, very old-fashioned, grey, and dying political party, all they care about is ways to control the lives of others, while doing their best to obstruct the other side trying to fix real problems, which we have plenty of. It is like an obsession of the small-minded amongst us.
I picture Jorg kneeling in front of a statue or large picture of Obama adorned with lighted candles and praying that the GOP would just go away.
Dirk: For the record: I don't pray! Shouldn't you know that by now? GOP is working hard to make themselves go away, without my help, and only resisted by those who don’t know better. The audacity of those who resist what’s the better course for the country!
Dirk: And also for the record: Yes, indeed, I admire President Obama, both for what he is, the example he has set, and not the least for all he accomplished, despite compact obstruction from the “Godly Obstructional Pious”, or GOP if you prefer. Remember what Obama inherited from his predecessor, a totally unqualified, uneducated minority-selected one who listened to voices inside his head and lied us into unnecessary, unwinnable, extremely costly and bloody wars. Is that someone you would prefer instead of Obama?
Btw.: Have you read Obama’s books? Any of them?
Good one, Dirk, and easily visualized. Don't forget the 2009 to 2016 calendars. We know there won't be any current calendars - you can't live in the past with a reminder of the here and now.
Terence - please answer that you read Obama's ghost-written books cover to cover. He redefined audacity and has had gullible followers since helping him pay for his multi-million dollar estates.
Dirk, I believe there was a literary review (maybe the Onion) that said reading Archie and Jughead comic books were more interesting than any Obama book. However, since Jorg is such a devotee, perhaps Jorg can tell us whether Obama explained how he traveled to 57 states in the US. Or how Obama thinks we built the Intercontinental Railroad. Or why if we liked our plan, we couldn’t keep it. I’d like to hear Obama’s rationale on why he held a COVID super-spreader birthday party where the servers wore masks but nobody else did.
Dirk: You have quite a not-so-admirable track record of tossing out things you haven’t thought through, or don’t know much about. Then, when faced with logical follow-up questions, you retreat and go into hiding., like now and so many times in the past.
So, I’ll give you a chance to save some face: Who would you prefer in the WH, Bush jr. or Obama? Or, what about Trump vs. Obama, despite Obama being black?
You know Jorg - it is difficult to debate with a person who has the mentality of a 4-year old and who is also a racist. No matter what I say, it does not resonate with you and in your book, I will never be right or make any sense. I am not hiding but I am not wasting my time and words to respond to your incomprehensible LTEs. And BTW, I did not vote for Trump because he is White.
Dirk: That’s exactly what I was referring to in an earlier LTE, and what Ray reminded us about just the other day, - using ad hominem as a shield for your own ignorance when you don’t have any valid arguments, or simply don’t grasp what the exchange is all about.
So, why did you vote for Trump when there was no black opponent, and have you had any regrets when it now should have become abundantly clear for everyone what a treasonous crook he is, - obvious even for his most die-hard supporters?
Thank you, Craig Wiesner, for your thoughtful and insightful column. Your words are always food for thought and bring me a new perspective for hope and action.
I like your optimism, Mr. Wiesner. However, these days are more about division rather than unity so the only “deeper” connections people are going to make are echo chamber connections, resulting in deeper hurt and less healing. A quick read of the comments in the DJ (and in this perspective) shows that decidedly left-wing folks refuse to live in the here and now, instead preferring to constantly jibber-jabber about “orange man bad” or “bad” folks in the right, while willfully ignoring the America Last policies in place, nationally, statewide, and locally. When Democrats prefer lawlessness and disorder, and harboring fugitives and lawbreakers, more than their citizens, it’s no wonder loneliness and isolation are prevalent (I’d bet more prevalent in blue areas than red). Perhaps we should have optimism that this country won’t reach a tipping point into civil war. If it does, many know they’ll be on the right side of history.
Come on Jorg..."treasonous crook"? Give the one-term, twice-impeached and now indicted former president a break. Show some respect! LOL.
I’m sorry, GE52, I got carried away. Soon, the poor fellow will need serious Republican help to break out of jail.
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