Friends 'til the end ...
Unless you have been in lock down without any media interference for the last few weeks, you know by now that the series finale of Friends aired last Thursday night. With two million advertising spots and one-hour specials on every channel that could come up with a "look back at how Friends became real-life friends," we were bombarded, nay, attacked, with false reminders that this was the best show on television.
Need I remind you of the days of Cheers, General Hospital when Frisco and Felicia were still on, and Melrose Place? How about Beverly Hills, 90210, Silver Spoons, The Cosby Show and, of course, Seinfeld?
Being of sound mind, I will have to disagree that Friends was the greatest show on TV. In fact, I will go out on a limb here and say that the series finale of this 10-year run roller coaster ride of good writing and terrible writing, of druggy Matthew Perry and sober Matthew Perry, of skinny Rachel and Monica to even skinnier Rachel and Monica, sucked.
This program did not go out on top as the critics like to portray. Friends did not leave the party early with the rest of the guests wanting more. It crawled out the door, a slow death, with rare breaths of humor, as the audience waited, like suckers, for a full recovery. And this, ladies and gentlemen, is what happens when your Friends come in a box.
My selections for you for the week of May 9:
Recommended for you
MONDAY... Jeopardy: Power Players from Washington, D.C. (ABC, 7 p.m.) This weeks contestants span the realm of political analysts, news anchors and authors. Highlights for the week include Bob Woodward, Ari Fleischer, Al Franken, Tim Russert and Maria Bartiromo. Instead of hiding behind desks and book covers, Americas hot slew of political satirists and commentators are put in the hot seat, which will ultimately promote those desk jobs and books. Frontline: "The Jesus Factor" (KTEH, 9 p.m.) A look at President Bush's own Christianity and his political strategies. Family Plots (A&E, 9 p.m.) The usually punny reality series hits a serious note while planning a child's burial.
TUESDAY ... Dateline NBC (NBC, 9 p.m.) You know the drill. Keeping with the week long send-off, interviews with the cast and producers of Friends - oops, I mean Frasier. The Dick Van Dyke Show Revisited (CBS, 9 p.m.) The cast re-unites and picks up 40 years later ... in color. Showbiz Moms and Dads (Bravo, 9 p.m.) Our little 3-year-old pageant junkie goes for the mini diamond crown in a co-ed competition while the ever excited 11-year-old Jordan acts in a film with the equally talented Heidi Fleiss. I guess the idea that your son is working with a former prostitute who ran her own empire doesn't have much affect when you're trying to get rich off your kid.
WEDNESDAY...The Bachelor (NBC, 9 p.m.) Ahhh ... the overnight dates. With three women remaining, Jesse woos his way into each of their hearts and a woman from his past ambushes him for an unexpected twist. The Bachelor: The Women Tell All (NBC, 10 p.m.) Bitterness comes in the form of the 22 cast-offs as they reunite with Jesse to dish on their experience and grill the quarterback. The Carol Burnett Show: Let's Bump Up the Lights (CBS, 10 p.m.) A look back at clips and funny outtakes from the '70s variety show. Troy: The Real Story of Sex in the City (A&E, 10 p.m.) On the horizon of Brad Pitt's new summer blockbuster, a real look into the siege of Troy with interviews from the cast of "Troy."
THURSDAY ... Frasier: Analyzing the Laughter (NBC, 8 p.m.) Memories and a look back at the funniest moments - again. Frasier: Series Finale (NBC, 8:30 p.m.) Skipping back to its original night, the dryly humored Frasier bids farewell, again. I wonder if he'll have another spin off. ER (NBC, 10 p.m.) Season Finale. Dr. Kovac puts on his cape as he, once again, saves the day in a massive car wreck. Kerry continues to battle for custody of her son and Abby tries to make a lasting impression on a dying man. I expect there will be nothing but thumbs up for this less-than-uplifting finale.
FRIDAY ... SATURDAY ... Honestly, I don't know what to tell you. There is nothing on TV worth staying in for. Movie, anyone? The documentary Supersize Me looks at what happens to the body through the cruel world of fast food. Filmmaker Morgan Spurlock dedicates 30 days to eating nothing but three meals a day of McDonald's. We watch his weight dramatically increase and his health rapidly decline. Quite disturbing, but well worth it. 13 Going on 30 - yeah, I saw it - stars Alias star Jennifer Garner and is surprisingly entertaining. In the tradition of such films as "Big" and "Vice Versa," a wish is worth 17 years. With a magical advance into the body of her future self, the 13-year-old brain still resides and realizes all the mistakes she has made in her fast-paced life. Seriously, this is actually funny and a throw back to your own junior high years. Man on Fire, starring Denzel Washington is a great film. While it was not my first choice, Mean Girls was sold out, so I reluctantly agreed to see this new thriller and was more than pleased that I did. The film thrusts us into the midst a real South American issue of kidnapping and ransom. Don't get me wrong, it has all the Hollywood emotion and intense editing, but the film is solid and if nothing else, Denzel is always an impressive sight.
And finally, I did get to see Mean Girls but, sadly, was a bit disappointed. Disney's new industry fave, Lindsay Lohan, stars in this satirical look at the cruel world that is ... popular girls in high school. Written by head Saturday Night Live writer, Tina Fey, who also co-stars in the film, I expected something spectacular. While the sub-stories were funny and there were realistic takes on the life every woman has experienced as one character or another, the main story line left a little something to be desired. However, I still recommend this film to everyone just to listen, see and be entertained by the rows of young girls that are sitting in the film waiting to be portrayed on the big screen. Their conversations, antics and "oh my Gods" are well worth the $9.50.

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