“My ability to remember song lyrics from the ’80s far exceeds my ability to remember why I walked into the kitchen.” This anonymous internet meme begins a book, “Why We Remember — Unlocking Memory’s Power to Hold on to What Matters,” by Charan Ranganath, a professor at the University of California, Davis.
Does this ring a bell?
For anyone near my age it does. You forget a name, the title of your favorite movie or Netflix production, and you wonder — am I losing it? Read Dr. Ranganath’s book to feel better or worse. If only we had the ability to file/save our unwritten thoughts.
As graduation season approaches I have much to look forward to — two graduations. One at Stanford and one at UC Berkeley. I am also looking back at my own. I can’t remember much about my high school graduation, except I was concerned who would be my assigned male partner to walk to the stage. Was he someone I knew? Someone I liked or the reverse? Someone popular? Someone handsome? Today I have no memory of that young man.
I didn’t even want to attend my college graduation. I was looking forward to my new job, my new life where I would be living far from home and on my own. But my wise friends convinced me it would be a cruel blow to my parents who had traveled 3,000 miles for this event. And it was memorable. It was held outdoors at a spectacular location, Frost Ampitheater and the speaker was Clark Kerr, the UC Berkeley chancellor. He gave an inspirational speech on how important it was to be an individual and keep an independent mind. Who knows how that speech would be received today?
I try to understand what’s going on now on college campuses. Years ago I probably would have been protesting but today’s protests don’t seem the same as the Vietnam ones. They make me worry about our students and their future and whether graduations this year will be happy occasions.
One of the best things about being a high school board member is being a graduation speaker. These are such celebratory occasions for the families and students. I have so many fond memories of these events. I had a white suit which I wore for these occasions. Did I shake hands with 1,000 students as I handed them a diploma? Yes I did. Did I wash my hands when done?No. It was decades before COVID.
Once a student kissed me on the cheek. I wasn’t offended but surprised. Once a student planted a mouse in the palm of fellow Trustee Ruth Steiner. She didn’t blink, but handed the mouse right back. I would have screamed.
The most terrifying graduation was when I was assigned to speak when my daughter was the graduation speaker. I didn’t want to embarrass her and she didn’t like the idea either. She thought I would say something stupid. So I tried to be funny and make it short. It’s no fun to be in competition with one of your children.
Do I remember what happened? No.
I have a nephew who is brilliant and a rebel. He was selected as graduation speaker at an Ivy League university based on his grades. It was considered a great honor. He used the pulpit to blast the university. His family was embarrassed. Today, he would be considered a hero.
Early in the civil rights movement, two East Coast students went to the South to register Black voters. They were killed. My husband was recruited by a liberal group of San Francisco attorneys to head south and continue the registration. I begged him not to go. I had two young children at the time and didn’t want to be a widow. Today I am not sure if I would discourage him. Times change. People’s attitudes change.
Some of my readers consider me too liberal, too hard on Trump. My grandchildren think I am too conservative. I certainly wasn’t in my youth. Would I have participated in college protests? Depending on the issue, I might have. But watching today’s college protests has not been fun. I attended Columbia University during the Army-McCarthy hearings in the 1950s.
There was little, if any, mention of this major event on campus. And no protests. Instead a classmate and I went to a local bar to watch on TV. Times have changed. I watched the New York police called to Columbia’s campus to arrest uncooperative students and non-student protestors. UC universities and USC have also called the police to restore order and allow non-protesting students and professors to return to class. Graduations are scheduled soon. Not fair to families and students if these special events have to be canceled.
Sue Lempert is the former mayor of San Mateo. Her column runs on Mondays. She can be reached at sue@smdailyjournal.com.
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(2) comments
Agreed, Ms. Lempert, “Graduations are scheduled soon. Not fair to families and students if these special events have to be canceled.” In some cases, it’s too late. Perhaps we should allow students who miss out on this special event to sue the ones who caused the cancellation. I hear universities have deep pockets. In turn, these universities can go after the students and non-students causing the cancellation. If there are no consequences, you can be sure mayhem, or worse, will continue to expand as time moves on.
When universities cancel graduations, close schools and force children to learn using zoom, it provides an undeserved victory to Hamas, the anti-Semites, and the George Soros and Bill Gates paid protesters. Protestors should be treated the same way the federal government treated Jan 6 protestors. Oh I know, that’s different
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