1:06 am
  Local News
  State / National / World
  Opinion / Letters
  Arts / Entertainment
  Submit Event
  Comics / Games
  DJ Designers
  Advertise With Us
  About Us
Ponytail police
February 21, 2014, 05:00 AM By Jon Mays Daily Journal

It sounds easy, sure. Your daughter’s hair is long, it gets in her face, you have to put it in a ponytail.

Little did I know there are ponytail police. Members of this organization are surreptitious. They look like normal people, act like normal people and talk like normal people. But you know they are a member of the ponytail police when phrases like, “Did Daddy do your ponytails today?” pop up directed to your daughter. Or “What a cute way to do her hair.” My favorite: “Are those dreadlocks?”

Yes, I know doing a ponytail is easy for most, but anyone who has taken a look at the top of my head lately should know there hasn’t been anything there with which to practice for quite some time. And practicing on a squirmy 2-year-old is not the easiest. The dreadlocks look is a punt when all else fails. It’s a quick grasp and a rubber band that does the trick but makes her look like she should have a hacky sack. Yes, I know I should brush or comb the hair, but sometimes (OK, most times) she would rather not have that happen. Maybe it’s my technique — although I’ve learned about brushing from the bottom — or maybe she’d rather spend her time with more worthwhile projects like dumping things on the ground or dancing.

I figure the basics are covered when I’m in charge in the morning. She typically wears cleanish clothes that may or may not match or may or may not be appropriate for the weather conditions (sometimes there is the sincere question, “Does she dress herself?” I wish). She eats breakfast that I cook (for the most part). I get her to brush her teeth (although sometimes it’s more of a placing the toothbrush into her mouth in a random way). I change her diaper when needed. I play with her. I read to her. She seems happy. We get along.

And every day I try to get her to allow me to fix her hair. Sometimes she wants two pigtails but changes her mind halfway through so they are so far from even it’s a little sad. For me. She doesn’t seem to care. Sometimes she changes her mind about the color of the rubber bands she requires halfway through which throws everything off. Other days it’s successful and I can get one smooth ponytail in the back with no bumps in the front. Hooray! And I have even been known to have two even pigtails that look really cute. Those are the days when I hear, “You’re getting better!” That’s nice to hear, but still, it would be nice if that was the norm and there was no need for commentary from the ponytail police.

What is also challenging is that the kind people at her day care have a natural knack for hair and sometimes redo it so nice my wife just knows it wasn’t me. I suppose I could ask for their tricks, but maybe that’s cheating?

But maybe, just maybe, it will get the ponytail police off my back until her hair grows long enough for a headband.

Jon Mays is the editor in chief of the Daily Journal. He can be reached at Follow Jon on Twiter @jonmays.



Tags: ponytail, sometimes, there, maybe, police, people,

Other stories from today:


Print this Page Print this Page  |  Bookmark and Share
<< Back
Return To Archives

Daily Journal Quick Poll
What's the best thing about the Super Bowl?

The game itself
The commercials
The half-time show
The game, the commercials and the half-time show
Having or going to a party


San Mateo Community College District
Strong quake hits Taiwan, many trapped in toppled building
TAIPEI, Taiwan — A 6.4-magnitude earthquake struck southern Taiwan early Saturday, toppling at lea..
US added just 151k jobs in Jan.; unemployment at 4.9 pct.
WASHINGTON — The U.S. economy added 151,000 jobs in January, a slowdown from recent months but sti..
Jobs report helps ease concerns a recession might be nearing
WASHINGTON — U.S. manufacturing is shrinking, corporate profits are declining and goods are piling..
Julian Assange claims total vindication with UN panel ruling
LONDON — A little-known United Nations human rights panel has sided with WikiLeaks founder Julian ..
More >>  
©2016 San Mateo Daily Journal
San Mateo County order to show cause